Saturday, December 24, 2011

Our First Christmas

The feelings and emotions are still raw and {{right there}}. It's hard to deal with the day to day emotions let alone Christmas. I'm not 100% how I am gonna get through the next couple of days let alone the New Year feeling like I am leaving my one and only son in the year 2011.

I know it will get better, I know I will have good days and bad and I know in the rational part of my brain that I will never ever forget his laugh, his dimple right above his butt crack and his love for Elmo. But unfortunately the holidays are making it a little bit harder to help myself get beyond the grief.

I still have that peace, I do. He is gone and in no more pain, but like I said on face book a few days ago, DAMMIT I miss that kid!

Christmas '10

4 comments:

  1. Hi Beth,
    This is a hard journey. I know there are many praying for you and I am one of them. Continuing to lift you up to the Lord and that the change in the new year will be not too hard on you.

    Praying,
    <><

    ReplyDelete
  2. Praying for you and i know little Keegan is in enjoying his 1st xmas a heavenly angel

    ReplyDelete
  3. Dear Beth,
    I just stumbled by coincidence over your blog and prayed for your son and you for the last 1.5 years or so. I understand that nothing I - a stranger - write or say can comfort you. The picture you posted is beautiful. Keegan's poise and dignity have deeply impressed me and will always humble me.
    And yes, I wish you other children. But of course, you will always stay Keegan's mommy. He will always be your son.
    Praying for Keegan and you.

    ReplyDelete

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