Our First Christmas

The feelings and emotions are still raw and {{right there}}. It's hard to deal with the day to day emotions let alone Christmas. I'm not 100% how I am gonna get through the next couple of days let alone the New Year feeling like I am leaving my one and only son in the year 2011.

I know it will get better, I know I will have good days and bad and I know in the rational part of my brain that I will never ever forget his laugh, his dimple right above his butt crack and his love for Elmo. But unfortunately the holidays are making it a little bit harder to help myself get beyond the grief.

I still have that peace, I do. He is gone and in no more pain, but like I said on face book a few days ago, DAMMIT I miss that kid!

Christmas '10