Tuesday, May 18, 2010
I have come to dread the word surgery. It's not like I every "liked" it per sei but now it has even more of a bad connotation in my mind. Even though his 7 hour surgery to remove the tumor went fine, every time he goes under I get that dreadful feeling in my stomach and I can't decide if I want to puke my brains out or poop my brains out! Well, tomorrow bright and early at 10 am he is having surgery to put in a G tube. The G tube is going to be the primary mechanism to feed him while he is getting chemo. Because he is still bottle fed and because the chemo will probably make him want to eat less, this is a must have.
I am scared as hell, this is the first step to start chemo. Starting last night they ran a 24 hour urine as a baseline for his Kidney fuctions, they did an echo of his heart today, again as a baseline for the strength of his heart muscle because chemo can weaken it. This G-Tube is a finality in my mind that this is really happening and its not just a bad nightmare.
I am on team Keegan! We WILL win! We WILL beat this! We will not lose this battle. We WILL stay strong! We WILL stay positive! We CAN do this! Through him all things are possible!