On February 23rd, kind of by freak accident, found out we were expecting another baby Chupp. While I was apprehensive from the beginning I was looking forward to the pregnancy and another baby. We were hoping this baby would have traits and attributes that Keegan had thus passing on his legacy.
Last Thursday March 8th I started to get pretty bad cramping. I went to the bathroom where I noticed I started bleeding, A LOT! I called my doctors office as soon as it opened b/c by that time I passed a clot that is what I think was the baby. My doctors office told me to hold out hope, whatever that means. By this time I was in soooo much pain and bleeding very very bad.
I arrived at the doctors office around 9:30, had an ultrasound which confirmed there was a sac but the technician could not see a baby. Then I went over to see my OB. He told me he could do a D&C that afternoon or he could give me some pain pills and another medication to pass the miscarriage naturally. After talking to him he decided it would be best to do the D&C. I went into his schedulers office and scheduled it for 1pm.
A little over 2 hours from the time I left Dr. Mann's office I would be back to square one and not pregnant anymore. While I knew it was probably for the best since first trimester miscarriages are more times than not due to chromosomal abnormalities, my mind was playing tricks on me and I began to question why God didn't want Ryan and I have to children. After all our first and most perfect baby was taken to heave after 2 year and a little over 2 months and our other baby didn't even live past 6 weeks gestation.
So this has left me to wonder, when is the third thing gonna happen and what is it? I am scared out of my mind. I am trying to turn it over to the Lord but geesh is it hard. We have had more than our fair share of bad things happen to us, when is it gonna stop?